Eicks' Totally Genuine Supervillain Diary Entry #7

Dear Totally Genuine Diary,

I can see by the way you're looking at me that you have questions.  No doubt you've heard the rumors, have read the news.  It's all true.  Chemical addiction has basically been cured for humans.  And yes, your suspicion is well-warranted- it's mostly my fault.

Before you go accusing me of wantonly committing good deeds though, let me assure you it was for purely selfish reasons, and that there are many other mitigating factors.  Oh, on the surface this may look good for humanity, and I suppose in the short term it actually is.  Taking the long view however this is just one link in a chain that ends in the utter annihilation of their precious Earth.

Mere declarations of intent (no matter how grand) will not suffice to divert your wrath I'm certain, so let's get into specifics.  I'll start by saying that although the cure will help a lot of people it won't necessarily seem that way to them.  The variable formula I developed completely eliminates chemical dependency in human organisms, but by itself that won't do anything about habits and preferences.  The addict might no longer need their fix biologically speaking, but that doesn't mean they won't reach for one anyway.  I solved that problem with a nasty little deterrent.

Regardless of the chemical or delivery system (alcohol, nicotine, heroin or whatever) the positive effects are completely negated.  The addict will no longer be relaxed or get high or what have you.  That alone wouldn't keep people from experiencing psychological or Pavlovian positives though.  My deterrent fixes that.  If the addict succumbs to force of habit and re-engages with the source of their prior addiction they will almost immediately start vomiting.  And crying, both because their eyes are watering and because the reaction causes mild temporary mood depression.  Oh and I threw in chills, sweats and diarrhea, just to get the point across.  So in the short terms I'm going to be responsible for a fair bit of individual misery.

So much for incidentals.  Let's get down to the bone.  I made a lot of money off this deal in exchange for very little work.  (Remember all that research and biochemistry work that went down the drain when I failed to find a way to make humans allergic to water?  I found a use for it after all.)  I marketed the process discretely and in a different persona for each individual addiction, but the corporations paid each version of me a small fortune.  A lot of them paid through shell corporations in order to temporarily conceal their investments from their rivals, and the money was clean to start with, so it wasn't hard at all to launder and redirect it to my purposes.  Available resources for the plan have increased greatly.

Not just money either.  Now that any addict who is interested in quitting can just pick up a cheap pill at the corner pharmacy, well, those drug cartels aren't doing so well.  Once they realized their customer base was shrinking dramatically they began fighting over remaining market share, and by fighting I mean fighting.  Lot of really nasty gang warfare going on right now.

That benefits me in multiple ways.  Law Enforcement is focused like a laser on trying to get these power struggles under control, so they're really not wasting a lot of time looking for people like me.  Some of the drug kingpins have brought in ringers in the form of Lifters, so DUO is equally distracted, as is Undershield (and even Overshield, at least to a certain extent.)  So I have increased freedom of movement.

Pair that with an abundance of available personnel.  Some of the drug lords have read the handwriting on the wall and absconded with their available wealth.  (Hard to repay your suppliers when you can't move your current inventory.)  Their subordinates have been left in the lurch.  Likewise, some of the more forward-looking gang members have realized there is no longer much of a future with the cartels so they've opted out and are free agents.  (There's also been something of a cascade effect impacting other types of criminal organizations.)  Most of these individuals are not suitable to my need, but they form a very large pool to sift through, and I've found promising minions in ones and twos.

Combine all that and you have the foundation for my newest enterprise.  With everyone distracted I went ahead and bought some land in Wyoming, then built an elaborate compound there (mostly underground.)  A few trusted minions drove through dropping off personnel and materials before continuing on their way, and no one was the wiser.  As I write we've already entered Stage 2 production.  It's all very encouraging.

So now you can see that curing chemical addiction was a necessary evil (by which I mean good.)  My plan is barreling forward full tilt thanks to this move.  Nor is this the only benefit.

On a more personal note let me say that this little maneuver completely ruined the lives of those drug cartel leaders who laughed at me.  Their followers abandoned them, their suppliers took all their riches, and the Feds nailed them trying to flee the country.  (Seems someone provided a few anonymous tips.)  They were tried, convicted and sentenced to long periods of confinement.  Their new abodes were federal penitentiaries where they lived humiliated and broken, bereft of power, influence or even respect.

Over the course of one night I did a little sneaking, paid each a personal visit.  They all went about the same.  We had a little chat, I explained what I had been up to lately.  Shared a chuckle over the vagaries of fate (well I laughed anyway.)  Then I killed them.  Good times.  Good times.

Oh, and one other bonus.  When I first sold the formulas, and again when the news of the cure was released, I spread a few harmless little rumors.  Just benevolent vague PR.  That the cure had been cooked up in a government lab.  That DUO efforts at Lifter Rehabilitation had resulted in the cure.  That Overshield had derived the cure from exploitation of alien tech.  That sort of thing.

Public approval of all the various organizations and associated personnel exploded.  People were very impressed to see some actual real world returns from their ongoing investments.  Especially such a revolutionary application applied to those in need.

Naturally the politicians are having a real hard time not taking credit.  It doesn't help that none of them are actually sure where the cure actually came from (my various personas are extremely private as it turns out.)  Many of them have actually convinced themselves that this really was part of a secret government project or something.  Quite a few are basking in the limelight, associating their pet projects with this success or even directly taking credit.  Higher-ups at DUO and Overshield are starting to succumb too, making statements that, although not technically false give very misleading impressions.

When I finally release the truth to the world (along with documentation and other evidence of validity) it's going to be comedy gold.

Murderously Yours,
Eicks